I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
