We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
