haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize