Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
