is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
