I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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