i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
