Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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