I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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