I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
