It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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