New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Randomize
