i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I'm always down for nudity.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
