Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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