sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
He told me they were just razor bumps!
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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