Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize