i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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