If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Randomize
