i just wanna soil my oats bro
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
