Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize
