i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize
