can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
