He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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