new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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