u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
