...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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