party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
