You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
