i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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