Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
