The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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