ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
