ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
