I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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