oh god the rape fog is back!
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
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