i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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