She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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