girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
