I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Boobs speak an international language.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
