Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
