she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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