you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Randomize