just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
