This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
