I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
