It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
