Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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