Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Randomize