Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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