I wannas sexs uuuuu
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
