I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
My life is pants optional.
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